The Strategic Mom

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2020 Vision (Part 1): Using Gratitude to Create a Life of Joy

When discussing the concept of vision, many think only in terms of eyesight; however, vision is simply the ability to see and plan for what’s ahead. When it comes to our eyesight, 20/20 vision is recognized as normal visual clarity, but last year, as we approached the year 2020, the term ‘2020 Vision’ became a popular way to describe the intentionality, foresight and focus we sought to have as we embarked upon a new year and decade full of promise and possibility. 

Unfortunately for most, the impact of COVID-19 on the health of people, companies, and world economies has put our positive 2020 outlook in jeopardy. As we work to define our ‘new normal’, having a vision, or better yet a 2020 vision, seems more important than ever before. It is more critical now than ever to train our minds to focus on what’s ahead, and intentionally visualize, design, and manifest new and improved ways of living for ourselves and our families.

I’ve come to the conclusion that there are four critical focus areas to achieving a renewed 2020 vision. These focus areas are gratitude, intentionality, optimism, and faith/serenity. If you’re an Avengers fan, you can think of these focus areas as real-life infinity stones that grant us the power to reshape and redefine our reality and purpose for the better. Since explaining these focus areas required too much explanation for one post, I decided to break them into a four-part series, with each post exploring one of the focus areas starting with gratitude.

Gratitude

Gratitude is defined as ‘the quality of being thankful.’ Many only think of gratitude externally, focusing on being grateful for the kind acts of others, which is extremely important. However internal gratitude is arguably even more important, and focuses on the spirit of acknowledgement and appreciation for what we have, rather than the things we don’t. It’s a ‘glass-half-full’ mindset that views everything in our lives as a privilege, or better yet a gift, rather than a right, and has been scientifically proven to improve mental and physical well being

No matter your circumstance, there are people who have persevered and survived worse. Vision and perception are inseparably connected and adjusting your perception by adopting a filter of gratitude can be a powerful and indispensable habit for growth, well-being, and happiness. Just as photo filters can improve the way certain moments and images are captured and memorialized, gratitude can improve the way we experience and perceive life.

Below are three easy ways to use that warm hug of an emotion and mindset known as gratitude to sharpen your 2020 vision:

1) Don’t Allow Comparison to Steal Your Joy

From a young age, we’re taught to organize things around us based on comparison. As we grow older, these comparisons are increasingly used to contextualize ourselves against others. From our bodies and bank accounts to our children and homes, our thoughts, words, and identities are often deeply rooted in comparison. While comparison, when properly used, can be a meaningful accelerator of self awareness and growth, it skews our perceptions towards the negative when improperly used.

Scrolling social media or the Internet, comparing our behind-the-scenes footage to the highlight reels of others can lead to destructive mindsets. It can also dupe us into misinterpreting the joys, successes, and values of others as our own. Instead, focus on your values, your joys, your aspirations, and your blessings, and encourage your children to do the same. Being grateful for what you have is key as there are countless things we take for granted that others would give anything to have.

2) Change Your “Have tos” for “Get tos”

Life during and post-COVID will have its challenges, but one way to use your gratitude filter to make it a bit easier is by replacing your “have tos” with “get tos”. “Have to” implies a chore or duty; while “get to” suggests a privilege or gift. For example, working from home? The idea that you ‘have to’ work from home while caring for your children, or that you ‘have to’ find new and interesting things to do with your family while being stuck at home sounds daunting, but listen to the subtle difference when you replace ‘have to’ with ‘get to.’ I ‘get to’ work from home while caring for my children, or I ‘get to’ find new and interesting things to do with my family at home. Reframing your obligations as opportunities is just as much about the words as it is the spirit behind them, and it can be a remarkable weapon for you and your family against the war with hopelessness, anxiety, and grief currently being waged in our minds. 

3) Be An Equal Opportunity Thanker

  • Don’t discriminate against anyone or anything in expressing gratitude. Take time to appreciate people, things, experiences, and yourself

  • Be thankful for the people in your life like your spouse, your kids, your parents, and even that crazy relative who always drinks a little too much during holidays and family gatherings. The reality is that some people guide us by giving us a blueprint of what to do or how to be, while others guide us by showing us what not to do or how not to be. Be grateful for both of these lessons. 

  • Be thankful for the simple and mundane things around you that many of us take for granted, like the sun beaming against your face, the smell of coffee and the warmth of the mug against your hands, or the gift of joy that fills your soul when you see your little one laughing. Savoring these simple experiences not only makes them more memorable, it’s empirically proven to boost your psyche and increase happiness in less than a week

  • To graduate from basic gratitude to higher order gratitude, we also have to push ourselves to be grateful for the things that don’t bring joy; the things that instead bring disappointment and loss -- the layoff or furlough (reframe to ‘I get to have some time off’, or ‘I get to find a new job that will be a better situation for me’), the difficult child (realize that children go through phases and there are others that would literally give anything to have a child), or perceived failure (be grateful for the lessons that can be taken from the failure). It’s in these instances that gratitude can actually be most powerful.  As we perceive life through the more advanced lens of higher order gratitude, it trains our minds to perceive our stumbling blocks as mere stepping stones and can be unbelievably freeing. Put simply, to truly maximize gratitude, we must be thankful for the storm, the rainbow, and everything in between. 

Oprah Winfrey once said, “Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough.” While we may not know what next year, next month, or even next week holds, we and our families can manifest a life of joy, contentment, and even abundance by adopting a perpetual lens of gratitude. They say hindsight is 20/20; however, foresight and insight can also be 20/20 when we strive to continuously view life through a filter of appreciation, acceptance, and acknowledgement, rather than expectation and entitlement. No matter what you may lose or have lost, there is still so much to be grateful for and even more to be gained. Start and end your day by applying a filter of gratitude, and watch how you’re able to improve your joy and peace today and sharpen your vision for tomorrow.



If you enjoyed this post and would like more information on being intentional with your life, check out my posts on value and goal-based living, intentional self-care, childcare and development, and relationships

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